19 Sep 2011

THE MAN CODE (cap 406)

marvin saidi | 09:52 |
Good morning/evening thy fellow readers n blogger z so its now time for men to read and master thou CODE....
The Man Code
In The Man Code, “Men will know how to put up a protective wall that not only makes us SEEM like we don’t care, but can actually make us BELIEVE that we don’t care — unless that wall is broken down by the few people who can. Typically, those people are women we love and cherish: our moms, our sisters, and our girlfriends  — definitely not all girls this i must make clear, but certainly the ones who matter and make us feel safe enough to let go and be real.”
This is it. So it has been written, and so
it shall be enacted ..................
The CODE 1. Thou shall not rent the movie
Chocolate,glee. 

2. Under no circumstances may 2
men share an umbrella when the sun z hot.Never ever


3. Any man who brings a camera
to a bachelor party may be legally
killed and eaten by his fellow
partygoers.
4. When you are queried by a
buddy's wife, girlfriend, mother,
father, priest, shrink, dentist,
accountant, or dog walker, you
need not and should not provide
any useful information whatsoever as to his
whereabouts. You are permitted
to deny his very existence.
5. Unless he murdered someone in
your immediate family, you must
bail a friend out of jail within 12
hours.
6. You may exaggerate any
anecdote told in a bar by 50
percent without recrimination;
beyond that, anyone within
earshot is allowed to call
BULL****. (Exception: When trying to pick up a girl, the allowable
exaggeration rate rises to 400
percent).hahaha
7. The minimum amount of time
you have to wait for another guy
who's running late is 5 minutes.
For a girl, you are required to wait
10 minutes for every point of
hotness she scores on the classic 1-10 babe scale.
8. Complaining about the brand of
free beer in a buddies refrigerator
is forbidden. You may gripe if the
temperature is unsuitable.
9. No man is ever required to buy
a birthday present for another
man. In fact, even remembering a
friends birthday is strictly optional
and slightly ***.
10. Agreeing to distract the ugly
friend of a hot babe that your
buddy is trying to hook up with is
your legal duty. Should you get
carried away with your good deed
and end up having sex with the beast, your pal is forbidden to
speak of it, even at your bachelor
party.
11. Before dating a buddy's "ex",
you are required to ask his
permission and he in return is
required to grant it.
12. Women who claim they "love
to watch sports" must be treated
as spies until they demonstrate
knowledge of the game and the
ability to pick a buffalo wing clean.
13. If a man's zipper is down,
that's his problem--you didn't see
anything haha
14. The universal compensation
for buddies who help you move is
beer.
15. A man must never own a cat
or like his girlfriend's cat.
16. When stumbling upon other
guys watching a sports event, you
may always ask the score of the
game in progress, but you may
never ask who's playing. 



17. When your girlfriend/wife
expresses a desire to fix her whiny
friend up with your pal, you may
give her the go-ahead only if
you'll be able to warn your buddy
and give him time to prepare excuses about joining the
priesthood.
18. It is permissible to consume a
fruity chick drink only when
you're sunning on a tropical
beach... and it's delivered by a
topless supermodel... and it's free.bt in normal circumstances NEVER
19. Unless you're in prison, never
fight naked.
20. A man in the company of a
hot, suggestively dressed woman
must remain sober enough to
fight.
21. If a buddy is outnumbered, out
manned, or too drunk to fight, you
must jump into the fight.
Exception: If within the last 24
hours his actions have caused you
to think, "What this guy needs is a good ***-whooping", then you
may sit back and enjoy.
22. Phrases that may NOT be
uttered to another man while
weight lifting:
"Yeah, baby, push it!"
"C'mon, give me one more!
Harder!" "Another set and we can hit the
showers."
"Nice ***, are you a Sagittarius?"
23. Never hesitate to reach for the
last beer or the last slice of pizza,
but not both. That's just plain
mean.
24. If you compliment a guy on his
six-pack, you better be referring to
his beer.

25. Never join your girlfriend/wife
in dissing a buddy, except when
she's withholding sex pending
your response.
26. Never talk to a man in the
bathroom unless you're on equal
footing: either both urinating or
both waiting in line. In all other
situations, a nod is all the
conversation you need.
27. If a buddy is already singing
along to a song in the car, you
may not join him...too ***.

7 comments:

  1. funny one :)

    sammie
    from
    fashionbarbecue.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Apart from the cat one, rock on

    ReplyDelete
  3. Max thanx man much appreciation and im following u bdw

    ReplyDelete
  4. @heddin haha i presume u own a cat ryt? But thanx following u

    ReplyDelete
  5. lol! first thing that's made me smile all day:-)
    following u now

    ReplyDelete

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